Sunday, February 22, 2009
on my heart
so its been on my heart this week that we really need to be praying for president Obama. i personally didnt vote for him, but he is my president fair and square, and i am going to support him the best i can. i cant even imagine being in his shoes right now with the state of our economy and all. he has huge responsibilities that we cannot even fathom having, and doing the best he can i believe with what he has to go off of. now i know i am not the most versed and up to date on politics, but i just feel this true pull on the heartstrings from God to be praying for this man, and his family, and the other leaders of our country and the world right now. so please join me in praying. thank you.
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
personal assistant
so i have decided that moms need to have a personal assistant...it should be included with the "package" of having children. i dont think celebrities need one as much as moms do, so we should just get theirs free of charge.
a personal assistant could clean the house when i want to play with the kids...and play with the kids when i want to clean the house. they could shoo the kids out to the mall or outside when the weather is nice and i need a nap. they could return the phonecalls to the people i dont really want to talk to but need to, and they could do the same with emails that arent fun. my personal assistant would definitely be a live in, but she would have to be ok with sleeping in the workroom/storage room because i cannot possibly give up anymore space in my house to other people...but i want her here at all times in case i'm dealing with a sick kid in the middle of the night. my personal assitant would have no life of her own, but still be kind and witty, and a lot of fun to hang out with. my kids and husband would adore her, but not as much as they adore me. she would make me look like superwoman around the house and even out in public. she would be perfect.
ah....dreams...i wish i really could have a personal assistant!
a personal assistant could clean the house when i want to play with the kids...and play with the kids when i want to clean the house. they could shoo the kids out to the mall or outside when the weather is nice and i need a nap. they could return the phonecalls to the people i dont really want to talk to but need to, and they could do the same with emails that arent fun. my personal assistant would definitely be a live in, but she would have to be ok with sleeping in the workroom/storage room because i cannot possibly give up anymore space in my house to other people...but i want her here at all times in case i'm dealing with a sick kid in the middle of the night. my personal assitant would have no life of her own, but still be kind and witty, and a lot of fun to hang out with. my kids and husband would adore her, but not as much as they adore me. she would make me look like superwoman around the house and even out in public. she would be perfect.
ah....dreams...i wish i really could have a personal assistant!
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
suburban mom
so my mom and i went out shopping for some stuff this weekend, and we took willow with us...peyton stayed home with daddy since he had an ear infection.
anyways, as we are pulling into target in my suv (toyota hylander), my mom looks at me and says (half teasingly) that i am such a "suburban mom". I asked if she meant soccer mom, and she said no...not yet...just that i am just such a "mom" now...i take so much of the kids stuff in stride and my life is mostly about my kids now.
i guess i just didnt know any different anymore...as much as i think that i want my old life back (pre-kiddos), i am accepting the reality that it isnt going to happen...even when jeff and i get away for a night together...i am still somebody's mom...thats never going to change now...and its amazing how capable i feel these days...way more so that when i first had peyton...i dont think we left the house by ourselves except to go to mother/baby hour for the first few months! 2 weeks after i had willow at home, we were all out the door together alone for trips to the stores and whatnot...life just is. i cant change it, and i'm not really sure how i would change it if i could, except for the usual "more time in the day" stuff...but i wanted that prior to having kids cuz i just have too many darn interests.
so what makes someone a "suburban mom"? is it the ability to put aside selfish wants and focus on your kids needs? is it someone who hosts the playdates and doesnt mind the mess it creates in the process? is it the mom who always has the homemade cookies ready for a snack when the kids get home from school? who knows? i am not many of those things...i try to be, but i dont always succeed...in fact i fail more often than i care to admit...my intentions are always good and pure, but somehow my plan is never fully the plan that unfolds through the day. funny how that works...but its never really been "my plan" all along...even before kids, i was following God's plan...it just more "in your face" obvious when my plan differs from Gods plan now that I have kids....and i'm learning to accept that...and to try to give my day, myself, and my kids to God throughout the day. its hard...but man does it ever make for a nicer day when i do, and stop fighting the little bumps in the road from day to day. i make it work somehow...we all end up alive at the end of the day, and no one has been sold on ebay...yet ;)
i do love my life 98% of the time...there are always those moments that make me want to go back in time to when it was simpler and less "adult"...but after a little pity party (or a big one depending on the moment), i go back to my reality as it is, and move on...happily...my life is what it is, and i am ok with that....suburban mom or not.
anyways, as we are pulling into target in my suv (toyota hylander), my mom looks at me and says (half teasingly) that i am such a "suburban mom". I asked if she meant soccer mom, and she said no...not yet...just that i am just such a "mom" now...i take so much of the kids stuff in stride and my life is mostly about my kids now.
i guess i just didnt know any different anymore...as much as i think that i want my old life back (pre-kiddos), i am accepting the reality that it isnt going to happen...even when jeff and i get away for a night together...i am still somebody's mom...thats never going to change now...and its amazing how capable i feel these days...way more so that when i first had peyton...i dont think we left the house by ourselves except to go to mother/baby hour for the first few months! 2 weeks after i had willow at home, we were all out the door together alone for trips to the stores and whatnot...life just is. i cant change it, and i'm not really sure how i would change it if i could, except for the usual "more time in the day" stuff...but i wanted that prior to having kids cuz i just have too many darn interests.
so what makes someone a "suburban mom"? is it the ability to put aside selfish wants and focus on your kids needs? is it someone who hosts the playdates and doesnt mind the mess it creates in the process? is it the mom who always has the homemade cookies ready for a snack when the kids get home from school? who knows? i am not many of those things...i try to be, but i dont always succeed...in fact i fail more often than i care to admit...my intentions are always good and pure, but somehow my plan is never fully the plan that unfolds through the day. funny how that works...but its never really been "my plan" all along...even before kids, i was following God's plan...it just more "in your face" obvious when my plan differs from Gods plan now that I have kids....and i'm learning to accept that...and to try to give my day, myself, and my kids to God throughout the day. its hard...but man does it ever make for a nicer day when i do, and stop fighting the little bumps in the road from day to day. i make it work somehow...we all end up alive at the end of the day, and no one has been sold on ebay...yet ;)
i do love my life 98% of the time...there are always those moments that make me want to go back in time to when it was simpler and less "adult"...but after a little pity party (or a big one depending on the moment), i go back to my reality as it is, and move on...happily...my life is what it is, and i am ok with that....suburban mom or not.
Monday, February 9, 2009
i think i'm in love...
so i think i really truly fell in love with willow today...not that i didnt love her before, but we had this amazing moment of tenderness and connection today. :)
i was feeding her a bottle and she was drifting off to sleep in my arms...you know that baby look where they're heavy lidded and content, but still not totally giving into sleep yet...lol anyways...she was like that, and whenever i kissed her cheek or her head gently, she would give me a sleepy smile...it was just melt-your-heart sweet...so yeah...i think i'm in love again :)
angie
i was feeding her a bottle and she was drifting off to sleep in my arms...you know that baby look where they're heavy lidded and content, but still not totally giving into sleep yet...lol anyways...she was like that, and whenever i kissed her cheek or her head gently, she would give me a sleepy smile...it was just melt-your-heart sweet...so yeah...i think i'm in love again :)
angie
Thursday, February 5, 2009
organized chaos
so i used to say that i thrived on chaos...it was usually my excuse for having a messy room as a teenager, but still...i did function well in the chaos.
nowadays however, i do not function in as much chaos anymore...i never thought that i would ever be remotely left brained, having been scarily right brained my whole life...but now i frequently find myself craving organization and control in my chaotic life. 1 toddler + 1 baby + 1 husband + 1 self does not equal 4 most days. 4 would be the logical answer, but if i have learned one thing in my short 3 years of being a mom, and also in my 7 years of being a wife, its that logic doesnt always exist when you want it to, and especially not when you need it to.
for example...toddlers know NO logic...i swear...to you and i, it would be logical to get extra sleep when you are sick...we crave it usually...there is nothing like laying down in a warm comfy bed when you feel awful. to a toddler, this is the last thing they want to do...peyton has had a bad cold this past week, and since he no longer naps regularly, i have to trick him into naps...even when he feels awful and is practically falling asleep while playing, he says he's not tired and throws a tantrum if i even suggest a nap. also...i have learned that toddlers wake up earlier the later they go to bed! this totally defies logic in my book...if i go to bed late, i want to get up even later than usual in the morning to make up for it...when peyton goes to bed say an hour late, he gets up an hour EARLIER than usual! *headdesk*
and dont even get me started on babies and logic...those two word dont even belong in the same sentence! and husbands and logic dont usually exist together either, but thats mostly because they havent figured out how to read our minds yet, and of course, us women are the only truly logical ones in the family ;)
anyways....so me...the girl who used to defy logic at all costs as a teenager, and even in my twenties, now craves some organization among the chaos that makes up my life, otherwise i think i will start to drive myself insane...and believe me...its a short trip!
nowadays however, i do not function in as much chaos anymore...i never thought that i would ever be remotely left brained, having been scarily right brained my whole life...but now i frequently find myself craving organization and control in my chaotic life. 1 toddler + 1 baby + 1 husband + 1 self does not equal 4 most days. 4 would be the logical answer, but if i have learned one thing in my short 3 years of being a mom, and also in my 7 years of being a wife, its that logic doesnt always exist when you want it to, and especially not when you need it to.
for example...toddlers know NO logic...i swear...to you and i, it would be logical to get extra sleep when you are sick...we crave it usually...there is nothing like laying down in a warm comfy bed when you feel awful. to a toddler, this is the last thing they want to do...peyton has had a bad cold this past week, and since he no longer naps regularly, i have to trick him into naps...even when he feels awful and is practically falling asleep while playing, he says he's not tired and throws a tantrum if i even suggest a nap. also...i have learned that toddlers wake up earlier the later they go to bed! this totally defies logic in my book...if i go to bed late, i want to get up even later than usual in the morning to make up for it...when peyton goes to bed say an hour late, he gets up an hour EARLIER than usual! *headdesk*
and dont even get me started on babies and logic...those two word dont even belong in the same sentence! and husbands and logic dont usually exist together either, but thats mostly because they havent figured out how to read our minds yet, and of course, us women are the only truly logical ones in the family ;)
anyways....so me...the girl who used to defy logic at all costs as a teenager, and even in my twenties, now craves some organization among the chaos that makes up my life, otherwise i think i will start to drive myself insane...and believe me...its a short trip!
Monday, February 2, 2009
silence is golden...
why is it that you never truly appreciate silence until you have kids? at least this was the case for me.
i used to loathe silence...it made me uncomfortable and nervous...i remember when as a worship team at church, we did a good friday service, and there was a 5 minute period of silence for personal reflection...man did it ever feel like 5 years to me...when i used to talk to God or reflect upon something, i would play music...when i used to study or read a book for fun, the tv or radio would HAVE to be on for me to concentrate...seriously...my mind wanders i think if there isnt enough to keep it busy!
but since having kids, and more importantly, having a plethora of kids toys that light up, make noise, play music, talk, and rattle...sometimes all at once...not to mention a toddler that is a huge talker (really, he is, just come to our house...he's not that way in public so much, but he never shuts up at home!), and a baby who cries when she doesnt have someone paying attention to her, but otherwise is so happy that she coos...loudly!...i have found a deep appreciation for silence...i am no longer uncomfortable just hearing the noise in my head, or the creaks of the house settling at night as i play my DS or read...i actually feel relaxed instead of my usual tense self when everything is shut down for the night. i feel clearheaded usually (unless its 2 am and i have been playing pogo too long!), and sometimes more refreshed from that short bit of time to myself than i do after a full nights sleep. (granted, i dont know how much my hypersomnia plays into that)
anyways...to me...silence is now golden
i used to loathe silence...it made me uncomfortable and nervous...i remember when as a worship team at church, we did a good friday service, and there was a 5 minute period of silence for personal reflection...man did it ever feel like 5 years to me...when i used to talk to God or reflect upon something, i would play music...when i used to study or read a book for fun, the tv or radio would HAVE to be on for me to concentrate...seriously...my mind wanders i think if there isnt enough to keep it busy!
but since having kids, and more importantly, having a plethora of kids toys that light up, make noise, play music, talk, and rattle...sometimes all at once...not to mention a toddler that is a huge talker (really, he is, just come to our house...he's not that way in public so much, but he never shuts up at home!), and a baby who cries when she doesnt have someone paying attention to her, but otherwise is so happy that she coos...loudly!...i have found a deep appreciation for silence...i am no longer uncomfortable just hearing the noise in my head, or the creaks of the house settling at night as i play my DS or read...i actually feel relaxed instead of my usual tense self when everything is shut down for the night. i feel clearheaded usually (unless its 2 am and i have been playing pogo too long!), and sometimes more refreshed from that short bit of time to myself than i do after a full nights sleep. (granted, i dont know how much my hypersomnia plays into that)
anyways...to me...silence is now golden
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